POTD & Thoughts - Jan 22

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One might ask what is up with this photo....a picture of your television?? Again, a lot can come from just a picture, even if it is of a TV.

The show is a documentary on Matthew Shepard that was created by a friend. It is done with a lot more of talking about who Matthew was growing up, etc. It is a nice point of view.

I remember the Matthew Shepard incident. I think it was the first gay related death that drew my interest. Not even sure if that is how to say it. At this point in my life I had started to test the waters in regards to being openly gay and this was something that made me think alot about that choice.

I have seen most documentaries on him including The Laramie Project. I look forward to seeing him in heaven and giving him a hug.

At EIU I got involved with the pride group. At that time we were called LGBAU - lesbian, gay, bisexual, allies union. My last couple years with the group the name was changes to Pride because no one could ever get the acronym right....not even us. We were a unique group, diverse in age, race, gender identity, and how out we were. I made some great friends that helped to provide me a place where I could "be me" and it was safe and accepted. Even though we have all gone our ways, we still stay in touch.

Each year we did what was known as "Legacy of Hate" that focused on hate and discrimination. Although we were not the only group to participate, we were the most prominent. We had a huge display that I took pictures of one year, yet I do not know what ever happened to them.

The last year we did it, we invited Judy Shepard to come be our guest speaker and she accepted. She gave an amazing talk and then took time to visit specifically with our group and some of us individually. She loved the display and we were happy she had come.

There is a part of me that feels like that time in my life was so long ago. It was a good time though, I have never been "in your face" gay. I see it as just a part of me, it is something kind of intertwined through me. It is not my defining characteristic and it is a part of who I am. I knew that moving back home meant that I had to put some of that openness and acceptance back in the closet and lock the door, especially coming back and living at home. It was a piece of my life that I did not want to be used as ammunition against me.

So, yah, I took a picture of the television.

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