New thought patterns

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Wish I could say I got over that desire to be comforted, yet it has remained with me most of the day. I had hoped a nap would do it in, yet no luck.

I found myself dwelling on it earlier today, falling into some negative thinking. I found myself playing the "it's just me anyways" game, the one where things are for everyone yet if I don't receive it is ok because somewhere I am not important enough. I decided that I have to stop that. Yes, it *is* just me, and there is not anything wrong with that. "Just me" is as worthy and deserving as the next person. I am not less because of who I am....not anymore. (I can hear Chris saying, "and you never were.") There may be legitimate things that I am not deserving of, yet they do not include love, comfort, or nurturing. I can have and enjoy those things. I can desire them and I can feel a need for them. Although fulfilling them is a different thing, I have a right to them as everyone else does.

And although I have much more on my mind to share, my eyes are heavy and I have an early day tomorrow. Things will slow back down soon and I will write more regularly again.

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